Aria met Ezra’s mom. Caleb Rivers returned to Rosewood. Wren and Hanna teamed up. Ezra Fitz is apparently richer than Donald Trump. Clearly, Pretty Little Liars Season 3, Episode 8 wasn’t short on drama. Recap all the crazy twists that took place during “Stolen Kisses.” (Not only is “A” gallivanting around pilfering everyone’s deep, dark secrets but there’s a smooch thief terrorizing the town as well…Oy ve.)
Top 5 OMG Moments and The Big Ta-da from PLL Episode 3.08:
Meet The Matriarch: Poor Aria. She begins the morning with finding out that her dad’s sexy, young flame — Meredith — landed a job at Rosewood High. But girlfriend’s busy and she brushes her pops off in order to meet Ezra. Nevertheless, her morning gets even more uncomfortable when shes bursts into her lover’s apartment shouting, “Okay, marine…drop and give me twenty!” and then spots a debonair woman (who is the epitome of “diamonds and Chanel on a Sunday morning”) giving her the ol’ up and down look. Gasp — Ezra’s mom! The two of them appear to get along and exchange pleasant words — Dianne even informs her that Ezra’s real surname is Fitzgerald and invites her to a fancy schmancy gala. However, while Aria and Ezria attend a classy affair at the Osgood Museum organized by Ezra’s (ridiculously hot) mom, she quickly turns from mommy dearest to monster-in-law. She starts questioning Aria more than Detective Wilden ever has (cue that scene in Uncle Buck where little Macaulay Culkin annoys his unsuspecting relative with a game of “21 questions”) and suddenly Aria finds herself in HELL. Her adorable facial expression says it all, “Oh no. Where did we go wrong, friend?” Dianne then decides to ruin Aria’s fashion-forward evening by basically telling her that, just like the Hulk pulverizes great cities, she destroyed Ezra’s life and career, and offering her plenty of moolah to keep her underaged self far away from her son. “I’m not gonna stand by and let you ruin him.’ (Those are fighting words, Dianne!) Well, Aria’s not one to cause a scene so she bolts from the high society event and goes home where she sinks miserably to the ground and cries her heart out. Luckily, Byron is around and, instead of acting like a jerk as usual about this whole Ezra situation, he consoles his young daughter with a hug, and tells her that there’s no way ever that she could ever ruin anyone’s life. (Aww — Kodak worthy father and daughter moment right there!) Unfortunately for Dianne though, her parenting moment is not as endearing — especially when Ezra finds out that his bitchy mom was the reason for Aria’s abrupt departure from the party.
The English Patient: Wren’s a very skilled physician but this episode he comes off more as a sucker for love. And the object of his affection? Hannakins! The two of them meet up at the Brew for coffee and a chat. Unfortunately, the “date” isn’t as sexy as it sounds — they talk about Mona the whole time and Wren reveals that the Radley doctors want to send Miss Crazy Pants away to Saratoga, NY because, apparently, she’s been passing her medication to one of her visitors. (OMG! WHO WHO?!) You’d think that Hanna would be thrilled to hear that the person who ran her over in Season 1, put her in a coma, stole her family’s “borrowed” cash, and made her eat a bazillion cupcakes at Lucky Leons in front of cute football was being shipped far far away. But nope — Hanna’s devastated! “No one will care a brown rat’s ass for her in Saratoga,” she comments. So she and Wren then devise a plan to appeal to the Vanderwaals and Radley board members in an attempt to keep Mona in Rosewood. The plan? Dress up fancy, scribble down impressive, Spencer-approved words on purple note cards, and then make an argument on Mona’s behalf by highlighting her days as a Rosewood High loser. The room is full of adorable old men so Hanna bats her big, blue eyes and utters sincere words about her friend/stalker and they practically melt into a puddle of tears. The verdict: Mona stays! And in celebration, Hanna and Wren exchange a kiss. Uh-oh!
Synchronized Swimming: Emily is worried that Paige McCullers secretly hates her because of what happened at Jenna Marshall’s birthday party with the flask drama and all. Truth is, Paige is secretly hating…her own self that is, and she drops a major bomb on poor Em during a run through the woods together (because when people in this town want to have a serious conversation with each other, they decide to participate in a painful workout that leaves them short of breath). When Em tells her that she didn’t spike the flask and that someone else did the night Alison’s body was dug up from its very grave, Paige suddenly gets flabbergasted. And then she reveals a real shocker — one that leaves Emily looking like she’s just seen a ghost! Apparently, on the Night-That-Must-Not-Be-Named, Emily spent some time over at Paige’s where teh two of them kissed. However, when Paige ventured inside to grab a glass of water, Emily vanished. Em is clearly rattled by the news and leaves Paige hanging by herself in the woods. She heads to the same old boat house she visits earlier in the episode — where she and Nate reminisce about Maya and hate on evil Jenna – and — as luck would have it — she runs into Nate again who just happens to be lurking around late at night. They talk (again) about drunk and sober memories and that’s that. Emily appreciates his sage advice and Nate stares at her as though he’s imagining her without clothes on and then we get really creeped out by his lecherous eyeballing of her… it’s basically a whole snowball effect of weirdness. Thankfully, Emily exits out of the convo and meets up with Paige to explain why she was so freaked out about the kiss they shared on that night (you know — the one Em has no recollection of) and how she hasn’t been with anyone since Maya. Paige then tells her she’d love to kill whoever spiked Emily’s flask (whoa there, cowgirl), and just like she does when Nate reveals how much he wants to strangle Garrett, Emily finds herself reassuring a potential killer (the same one who tried to drown her not too long ago.) Cue a passionate and romantic kiss, followed by some synchronized laps in a heated pool.
Ladies, My Mercedes: Spencer is in need of a hacker extraordinaire and just like the island did with John Locke in Lost, Rosewood throws Ms. Hastings a bone for once…in the form of Caleb Rivers, who cruises into Rosewood in style. Apparently, Ezra isn’t the only one with a generous madre — Caleb’s biological mom seems to be making up for lost time by treating him to expensive vehicles and shirts that cost a lavish $400! (At least, that’s the story he’s telling.) Even Spencer notices and makes a remark about his big pimpin’ new lifestyle when zooms into the school parking lot looking like a million bucks — and then later offers him unsolicited advice about washing his luxurious cashmere sweater: “No, you should dry clean it. If you wash this, you will end up with a sweater for a shih-tzu.” Caleb laughs and participates with some witty banter of his own (which seems to thrill Spence) and then ends up helping her hack Maya’s website out of the goodness of his heart (and by that we mean either he truly loves Hanna and wants to impress her or he wants to keep tabs on the Liars and their “A” investigation). Conveniently though, as soon as Caleb exits scene, Spencer receives a cryptic text from her own personal stalker: “Mona’s almost gone. Hanna’s next. -A.” Coincidence? Meh.
The Code Crackers: The Super Sleuths are at it again! This time around, Spencer and Aria snoop through Detective Benson’s Mrs. Hastings’ “People vs. Reynolds” case files for Garrett. (We love how Spencer cautiously calls out, “MOM?!” before digging into her work suitcase. Aria looks very scandalized at Spencer’s invasive actions during this scene!) Spencer goes through the documents while Aria snaps photos of them with her phone. (Seriously, who needs a copy machine…) Miraculously, despite how long it takes them to go through the files, Spencer’s mom does not catch them in the act. So what do the gals find out? That of all places in Rosewood, Maya was killed in Emily’s own backyard! Moreover, they go through the witness list, which includes a side-note scribbled in by Mrs. Hastings saying that if she can break a witness named Bart Comstock then Garrett will be a free man. So naturally, before heading over to Osgood Museum art event, Aria drops by Bart’s place of employment (the movie theater) where she picks up a pamphlet and starts a conversation with him. (Smooth, girl, real smooth.) Bart seems taken aback that such a gorgeous girl is suddenly so interested in him. Scratch that — he looks horrified at the awkwardness of it all…almost as horrified as Aria does when she sees his name tag and realizes that people name Bart outside of the Simpsons world do exist. Meanwhile, after sharing some flirtatious comments with Caleb, Spencer and Hanna’s break through Maya’s website and discover a stream of video files recorded by her, including an eerie greeting: ”If you’re looking at me, beware this site is cursed.” (Maya laughs over this opening but Spencer is on the brink of fainting because the last thing she needs is more bad luck in her life.) Spence saves the goods and upon meeting up with all the Liars (minus Em) they begin scrolling through the clips — there’s one in which Maya gushes about Andy Marvel, another one in which she professes her love for Emily, and then there’s a TOTALLY BONE-CHILLING one in which a clearly frightened Maya bravely reveals that she can’t hide anymore. What does this all mean? WHAT DOES IT MEAN? No answer…yet.
The Big Ta-Da: Daddy Warbucks? Nuh-uh. Daddy Fitz! We don’t know about you but the biggest shocker of the episode was finding out that Ezra Fitz is loaded — as in wealthier than Warren Buffet and the Kennedy clan! Unfortunately though, he wants to nothing to do with his family’s riches and prefers being a struggling artist slash English teacher. Aria better put a ring on it and fast…and then convince honey boo boo over there to say yes to the cash ’cause times are tough! (That and the fact that a rich Ezra spoiling sweet Aria rotten would be super entertaining!) Oh and we’re forgetting one teeny tiny detail - at the very end of episode A is seen retrieving a large sum of cash from a local bank as well as enjoying a peppermint. Could Ezra be pretending not to care? Anything’s possible!
Which moment from Pretty Little Liars Season 3, Episode 8 was the most shocking in your opinion? Drop us a note in the comments!